1. If you've got a big mouth and you are controversial, you gonna get attention
2. If your lifeguard duties were as good as your singing, a lot of people would be drowning
3. Not everybody is perfect, and I don't think we should be looking for perfect people
4. I never want to hear that song again. I cannot stand it. I'm allergic to it
5. You're useless, I'm bored - yes or no?
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
wHerE aRe yOu iN InDiA ? FiVe TiPs
If you ever get lost in India and want to find out where you are, this is the best way of doing just that.
1. Two guys are fighting and a third guy comes. he writes a software program to solve the issue but the fight does not stop because of a bug in the program --> that's Bangalore
2. Two guys are fighting. a crowd gathers to watch. a guy comes along and quietly opens a chai - Coffee stall --> that's Ahmedabad
3. Two guys are fighting. Both of them take time out and call their friends on mobile. now 50 guys are fighting --> you are in Hyderabad
4. Two guys are fighting and a third guy comes along & tries to make peace. The first two get together & beat him up --> that's Delhi
5. Two guys are fighting. a crowd gathers to watch. Someone calls police. The police come and later charge all the people crowded there. Someone throws stones at the police. The police throw stones back at the crowd. Some people are arrested. Damages to the shops nearby. next day, harthal and holiday declared by government --> You are in Kerala
1. Two guys are fighting and a third guy comes. he writes a software program to solve the issue but the fight does not stop because of a bug in the program --> that's Bangalore
2. Two guys are fighting. a crowd gathers to watch. a guy comes along and quietly opens a chai - Coffee stall --> that's Ahmedabad
3. Two guys are fighting. Both of them take time out and call their friends on mobile. now 50 guys are fighting --> you are in Hyderabad
4. Two guys are fighting and a third guy comes along & tries to make peace. The first two get together & beat him up --> that's Delhi
5. Two guys are fighting. a crowd gathers to watch. Someone calls police. The police come and later charge all the people crowded there. Someone throws stones at the police. The police throw stones back at the crowd. Some people are arrested. Damages to the shops nearby. next day, harthal and holiday declared by government --> You are in Kerala
LeGo aNyOnE? FiVe AmAziNg FaCTs
1. LEGO is an abbreviation of the two Danish words "leg godt", meaning "play well"
2. If you built a column of about 40,000,000,000 LEGO bricks, it would reach the moon
3. There are 915 million ways to combine six LEGO bricks
4. Approximately seven LEGO sets are sold each seconds
5. During the moulding process, the plastic is heated to 232°C until its consistency is that of dough
2. If you built a column of about 40,000,000,000 LEGO bricks, it would reach the moon
3. There are 915 million ways to combine six LEGO bricks
4. Approximately seven LEGO sets are sold each seconds
5. During the moulding process, the plastic is heated to 232°C until its consistency is that of dough
FiVe rEaSonS wHy wE LiKe gOoGLe
1. Picture & video sharing
2. Google Earth, Maps & Latitude
3. Google Labs
4. Share office documents and search full-text book
5. Get definition, calculate and convert
Need I say more? It is amazing how Google has become more than just a search engine
2. Google Earth, Maps & Latitude
3. Google Labs
4. Share office documents and search full-text book
5. Get definition, calculate and convert
Need I say more? It is amazing how Google has become more than just a search engine
ToDaY's ToP FiVe HaNdPhoNe (GSMArena.com)
1. HTC HD2
2. Motorola MILESTONE
3. Sony Ericsson Satio (Idou)
4. BlackBerry Bold 9700
5. Samsung E1410
2. Motorola MILESTONE
3. Sony Ericsson Satio (Idou)
4. BlackBerry Bold 9700
5. Samsung E1410
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
FiVe cHelsEa FaNs jOkes
1. Every time Big Roger attends a Chelsea game he books 2 seats.
One to sit in, the other to throw when the fighting starts.
2. Two blokes were walking through a cemetery when they happened upon a tombstone that read: "Here lies John Sweeney, a good man and a Chelsea fan." So, one of them asked the other: "When the hell did they start putting two people in one grave?"
3. I've heard that Stamford Park has arguably the best pitch in the Premiership. Well...not entirely surprising considering all the sh*t that has been on there.
4. Why do Chelsea fans whistle whilst sitting on the toilet? -> So they know which end to wipe!
5. What does Claudi Ranieri say when Chelsea score? -> Fantastic. Now let us try to get goal at other end of pitch.
One to sit in, the other to throw when the fighting starts.
2. Two blokes were walking through a cemetery when they happened upon a tombstone that read: "Here lies John Sweeney, a good man and a Chelsea fan." So, one of them asked the other: "When the hell did they start putting two people in one grave?"
3. I've heard that Stamford Park has arguably the best pitch in the Premiership. Well...not entirely surprising considering all the sh*t that has been on there.
4. Why do Chelsea fans whistle whilst sitting on the toilet? -> So they know which end to wipe!
5. What does Claudi Ranieri say when Chelsea score? -> Fantastic. Now let us try to get goal at other end of pitch.
FiVe sTeps tO rEduCe GloBal wArMinG
1. Reduce, Reuse, Recycle
Do your part to reduce waste by choosing reusable products instead of disposables. Buying products with minimal packaging (including the economy size when that makes sense for you) will help to reduce waste. And whenever you can, recycle paper, plastic, newspaper, glass and aluminum cans. If there isn't a recycling program at your workplace, school, or in your community, ask about starting one. By recycling half of your household waste, you can save 2,400 pounds of carbon dioxide annually.
2. Use less heat and air conditioning
Adding insulation to your walls and attic, and installing weather stripping or caulking around doors and windows can lower your heating costs more than 25 percent, by reducing the amount of energy you need to heat and cool your home. Turn down the heat while you're sleeping at night or away during the day, and keep temperatures moderate at all times. Setting your thermostat just 2 degrees lower in winter and higher in summer could save about 2,000 pounds of carbon dioxide each year.
3. Use compact fluorescent light (CFL) bulb
Wherever practical, replace regular light bulbs with compact fluorescent light (CFL) bulbs. Replacing just one 60-watt incandescent light bulb with a CFL will save you $30 over the life of the bulb. CFLs also last 10 times longer than incandescent bulbs, use two-thirds less energy, and give off 70 percent less heat. If every U.S. family replaced one regular light bulb with a CFL, it would eliminate 90 billion pounds of greenhouse gases, the same as taking 7.5 million cars off the road.
4. Drive less and drive smart
Less driving means fewer emissions. Besides saving gasoline, walking and biking are great forms of exercise. Explore your community mass transit system, and check out options for carpooling to work or school.
When you do drive, make sure your car is running efficiently. For example, keeping your tires properly inflated can improve your gas mileage by more than 3 percent. Every gallon of gas you save not only helps your budget, it also keeps 20 pounds of carbon dioxide out of the atmosphere.
5. Plant a tree
If you have the means to plant a tree, start digging. During photosynthesis, trees and other plants absorb carbon dioxide and give off oxygen. They are an integral part of the natural atmospheric exchange cycle here on Earth, but there are too few of them to fully counter the increases in carbon dioxide caused by automobile traffic, manufacturing and other human activities. A single tree will absorb approximately one ton of carbon dioxide during its lifetime.
Do your part to reduce waste by choosing reusable products instead of disposables. Buying products with minimal packaging (including the economy size when that makes sense for you) will help to reduce waste. And whenever you can, recycle paper, plastic, newspaper, glass and aluminum cans. If there isn't a recycling program at your workplace, school, or in your community, ask about starting one. By recycling half of your household waste, you can save 2,400 pounds of carbon dioxide annually.
2. Use less heat and air conditioning
Adding insulation to your walls and attic, and installing weather stripping or caulking around doors and windows can lower your heating costs more than 25 percent, by reducing the amount of energy you need to heat and cool your home. Turn down the heat while you're sleeping at night or away during the day, and keep temperatures moderate at all times. Setting your thermostat just 2 degrees lower in winter and higher in summer could save about 2,000 pounds of carbon dioxide each year.
3. Use compact fluorescent light (CFL) bulb
Wherever practical, replace regular light bulbs with compact fluorescent light (CFL) bulbs. Replacing just one 60-watt incandescent light bulb with a CFL will save you $30 over the life of the bulb. CFLs also last 10 times longer than incandescent bulbs, use two-thirds less energy, and give off 70 percent less heat. If every U.S. family replaced one regular light bulb with a CFL, it would eliminate 90 billion pounds of greenhouse gases, the same as taking 7.5 million cars off the road.
4. Drive less and drive smart
Less driving means fewer emissions. Besides saving gasoline, walking and biking are great forms of exercise. Explore your community mass transit system, and check out options for carpooling to work or school.
When you do drive, make sure your car is running efficiently. For example, keeping your tires properly inflated can improve your gas mileage by more than 3 percent. Every gallon of gas you save not only helps your budget, it also keeps 20 pounds of carbon dioxide out of the atmosphere.
5. Plant a tree
If you have the means to plant a tree, start digging. During photosynthesis, trees and other plants absorb carbon dioxide and give off oxygen. They are an integral part of the natural atmospheric exchange cycle here on Earth, but there are too few of them to fully counter the increases in carbon dioxide caused by automobile traffic, manufacturing and other human activities. A single tree will absorb approximately one ton of carbon dioxide during its lifetime.
FiVe ReAsOns wHy yOu wErE dUmped
1. You tried to kill yourself in the shower. By hanging yourself. With a bungee cord. You did not succeed.
2. You spent half the night discussing what the Canadian Wheat Board meant to you, then stole my identity and my shoes
3. After we fell asleep after having sex for the first time, I woke up to find you cracking my knuckles.
4. I'm not sure that making a single bottle of shampoo last for four years is something to celebrate.
5. You told me you didn't masturbate for three years because you were worried your dead grandmother could see you and would be disappointed.
2. You spent half the night discussing what the Canadian Wheat Board meant to you, then stole my identity and my shoes
3. After we fell asleep after having sex for the first time, I woke up to find you cracking my knuckles.
4. I'm not sure that making a single bottle of shampoo last for four years is something to celebrate.
5. You told me you didn't masturbate for three years because you were worried your dead grandmother could see you and would be disappointed.
FiVe MoNeY sAVinG TiPs
1. Drive your car longer. The buy new versus used debate often overlooks the most important factor--how long you own your car. Drive it as long as you safely can for substantial savings
2. Get healthy. Your health will directly impact the cost of life insurance and, in some cases, can reduce the cost of your health insurance.
3. Cook at home. If both the husband and wife work, this is likely to be very difficult. Start out with the habit of cooking at home once a week and slowly increase the frequency until you find a balance between saving money and getting stressed out.
4. Buy generic product. Does it really matter whether your cereal is made by Kellogg's or is the store brand? Does it matter if your milk is Oak Farms or the store brand? Find what works for you and switch to generic brands for at least a part of your grocery list.
5. Avoid impulse buying. Many of the things you want to buy do not seem all that urgent or necessary. If can, wait for a day or two. Waiting means you will be able to check prices and make an informed decision to buy it at the best possible price.
2. Get healthy. Your health will directly impact the cost of life insurance and, in some cases, can reduce the cost of your health insurance.
3. Cook at home. If both the husband and wife work, this is likely to be very difficult. Start out with the habit of cooking at home once a week and slowly increase the frequency until you find a balance between saving money and getting stressed out.
4. Buy generic product. Does it really matter whether your cereal is made by Kellogg's or is the store brand? Does it matter if your milk is Oak Farms or the store brand? Find what works for you and switch to generic brands for at least a part of your grocery list.
5. Avoid impulse buying. Many of the things you want to buy do not seem all that urgent or necessary. If can, wait for a day or two. Waiting means you will be able to check prices and make an informed decision to buy it at the best possible price.
FiVe LiTTLe kNoWn FacTs aBouT TiGeR WoOds
1. Tiger Woods picked up his first golf club at age two and almost from the start knew what to do with it.
2. Tiger Woods never graduated from Stanford. Two years into his course work, Tiger decided to move on with his golfing career and go pro.
3. In his first year in the circuit in 1996, he was named "Rookie of The Year"
4. For that same year, Tiger Woods was choosen by Sports Illustrated Magazine as "Sportsman of The Year"
5. Of all the golfers who have ever played the game, including great ones like Sam Snead ,Arnold Palmer or Jack Nicklaus, only two players have ever won ten Majors tournaments before the age of 30 - the great Bobby Jones and also the equally great Tiger Woods
2. Tiger Woods never graduated from Stanford. Two years into his course work, Tiger decided to move on with his golfing career and go pro.
3. In his first year in the circuit in 1996, he was named "Rookie of The Year"
4. For that same year, Tiger Woods was choosen by Sports Illustrated Magazine as "Sportsman of The Year"
5. Of all the golfers who have ever played the game, including great ones like Sam Snead ,Arnold Palmer or Jack Nicklaus, only two players have ever won ten Majors tournaments before the age of 30 - the great Bobby Jones and also the equally great Tiger Woods
FiVe qUoTes FrOm BaRaCk oBaMa
1. I don't oppose all wars. What I am opposed to is a dumb war. What I am opposed to is a rash war.
2. We can't drive our SUVs and eat as much as we want and keep our homes on 72 degrees at all times... and then just expect that other countries are going to say OK. That's not leadership. That's not going to happen.
3. What do you think a stimulus is? It's spending - that's the whole point! Seriously.
4. Why can't I just eat my waffle?
5. Focusing your life solely on making a buck shows a certain poverty of ambition. It asks too little of yourself. Because it's only when you hitch your wagon to something larger than yourself that you realize your true potential.
2. We can't drive our SUVs and eat as much as we want and keep our homes on 72 degrees at all times... and then just expect that other countries are going to say OK. That's not leadership. That's not going to happen.
3. What do you think a stimulus is? It's spending - that's the whole point! Seriously.
4. Why can't I just eat my waffle?
5. Focusing your life solely on making a buck shows a certain poverty of ambition. It asks too little of yourself. Because it's only when you hitch your wagon to something larger than yourself that you realize your true potential.
ToP FiVe piCk uP LiNe
1. Give a rose to her and say: I wanted to show this rose how beautiful you are
2. You know you might be asked to leave soon. You are making the other women look bad
3. When I'm older, I'll look back at all of my crowning memories, and I'll think of the day my children were born, the day I got married, and the day that I met you
4. Are you going to kiss me or do I have to lie to my diary?
5. You know how they say skin is the largest organ on the human body? Not in my case
2. You know you might be asked to leave soon. You are making the other women look bad
3. When I'm older, I'll look back at all of my crowning memories, and I'll think of the day my children were born, the day I got married, and the day that I met you
4. Are you going to kiss me or do I have to lie to my diary?
5. You know how they say skin is the largest organ on the human body? Not in my case
FiVe sTeps tO sAve mOneY wHen bUyiNg a CaR
1. Use dealer and manufacturer incentives. Sometimes, to help sell a vehicle, incentives are offer to help entice the buyer into going for a certain vehicle. This could be in the form of a cash rebate or low interest financing. When this is offered to you, and you like the vehicle in question, take it.
2. Don't pay the sticker price. Many times the sticker price on a vehicle(MSRP) is priced thousands of dollars over the price you could be paying. What could you be paying? Just use True Market Value. This is a tool used by Edmunds.com that will tell you what people are paying for a certain type of vehicle in your area. Do not pay more than what is listed.
3. Get proper value for your trade-in. Every used car has a value. Do not take less for your trade-in. Go to Edmunds.com. Put your vehicle's information into True Market Value. Be sure to input the vehicle's condition, mileage, options, and color. You will then be given a trade-in price.
4. Negotiate your price. Be confident. You have done your research, and you know what price you should pay. Do not pay over this price. If the dealer will not accept this price, say thanks but no thanks.
5. Sign the paperwork. After a deal has been agreed to, have the car salesman deliver the vehicle to you at your home. Only then should you sign the contract( that way you don't run the risk of being intimidated by having to sign it in the dealer's finance office). Congratulations! You have a brand new car that you paid less money for.
2. Don't pay the sticker price. Many times the sticker price on a vehicle(MSRP) is priced thousands of dollars over the price you could be paying. What could you be paying? Just use True Market Value. This is a tool used by Edmunds.com that will tell you what people are paying for a certain type of vehicle in your area. Do not pay more than what is listed.
3. Get proper value for your trade-in. Every used car has a value. Do not take less for your trade-in. Go to Edmunds.com. Put your vehicle's information into True Market Value. Be sure to input the vehicle's condition, mileage, options, and color. You will then be given a trade-in price.
4. Negotiate your price. Be confident. You have done your research, and you know what price you should pay. Do not pay over this price. If the dealer will not accept this price, say thanks but no thanks.
5. Sign the paperwork. After a deal has been agreed to, have the car salesman deliver the vehicle to you at your home. Only then should you sign the contract( that way you don't run the risk of being intimidated by having to sign it in the dealer's finance office). Congratulations! You have a brand new car that you paid less money for.
FiVe tHingS Not To Say To yOur Boss
If only i could say these things.. ;-)
1. Remember those assignment you gave me two weeks ago which is due today? Would you care to explain again to me what is it you really want? Only this time, try to speak slowly yeah..
2. You know those ideas that you gave during the meeting? It never does make any sense aint it?
3. Is that the picture of your daughter on your desk? Whoa.. Hot babe
4. Hang on a second, I am beating the high score
5. Some people are born to lead, some are born to follow, i guess you could stop pretending you are the boss now huh?
1. Remember those assignment you gave me two weeks ago which is due today? Would you care to explain again to me what is it you really want? Only this time, try to speak slowly yeah..
2. You know those ideas that you gave during the meeting? It never does make any sense aint it?
3. Is that the picture of your daughter on your desk? Whoa.. Hot babe
4. Hang on a second, I am beating the high score
5. Some people are born to lead, some are born to follow, i guess you could stop pretending you are the boss now huh?
FiVe tHinGs tO Do bEForE tHe YeAr End
1. Remember that piece of paper you wrote your resolution for this year. Well find it and at least do one of it !! ;-)
2. If you havent been socializing much this year, well start now. Trust me. You will thank me later when the bell struck midnight on new year.
3. Do some charity or help those in need. At least when 2010 come, you could say 'aah.. last year I help one blind guy cross the road'
4. Get ready for some serious party. Go shopping!!
5. Last but not least, get in touch with your loved one and tell them how you care for them. That would end the year with a good note.
2. If you havent been socializing much this year, well start now. Trust me. You will thank me later when the bell struck midnight on new year.
3. Do some charity or help those in need. At least when 2010 come, you could say 'aah.. last year I help one blind guy cross the road'
4. Get ready for some serious party. Go shopping!!
5. Last but not least, get in touch with your loved one and tell them how you care for them. That would end the year with a good note.
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